When You Do The Unexpected
How Not Doing the Predictable Thing is Very Beneficial
When you don't do or say what is expected, you change the entire landscape, and can use it
Whereever you live in the world, their are 'norms', there is the 'expected' response.Many of them are virtual 'knee jerks'; because it is so obvious that if you do this, the other person does that; on and on, so that it is no surprise.
When you don't do what everyone expects, they go into a kind of brain freeze in which they become actors who forgot their lines.
One of my favourite anecdotes concerns an interlude at the petrol station's little shop.
It was late, the only place open was the little shop at the ToTal.People were crammed inside.I had taken petrol, and because I wanted to pay by credit card had to go inside. I also wanted a pack of smokes.
I was about number 19 on the line.
I saw one of the other workers and said, "Can I see that pack of ciggies?" (notice I didn't say buy or want, I acted as if I just wanted to look at the box). The girl gave me the pack.As I reached the counter, since 18 people have left, I did not curse. I did not complain, I said; "I don't want to disturb her, I'll come back another time."
This is how I walked out without paying.
It gets worse; when I returned to pay, the cashier was so grateful that I didn't interupt her she organised a free teddy bear for me.
What I learned is that when people don't say what you expect, don't act the way you expect, you're thrown for a loop and have no idea what is happening. You can't grab purchase, for it is like an earthquake, and you will wind up saying or doing something you never expected.
When everyone is upset and you are calm, when everyone is dealing with an issue in these borders, and you change the borders. Someone tries to insult you and you take it as a compliment, someone expects you to be angry, and you smile, you own the board.
You just have to know what is expected, and not do it.